Shenmue Dojo

Struggling with an unpaid debt, a twenty something signs up as a weapons tester in a high-tech duel, but to get his pay he must defeat his next opponent--an adversary he can't seem to kill.

STATUS: Finished.
Genre: Over-The-Top Action/Thriller
Similar to: Fight Club, Wanted, Max Payne (2008), Sukiyaki Western Django, Equilibrium, Desperado

=======================================================================================

An ensemble cast of tech support reps try to survive abusive customers and wild in-house antics, meanwhile a vengeful customer is en route to find and destroy the call center!

STATUS: Finished.
Genre: Comedy
Similar to: Office Space, Waiting..., Clerks, IT Crowd
Concept Art:
Wanna read the script? Download here.

=======================================================================================

Five unrelated surfers come together to compete in a team based surfing competition to save a mom 'n pop shop from going out of business.

STATUS: Outline stage.
Genre: Coming of Age/Romantic Drama
Similar to: Adventureland, (500) Days of Summer

=======================================================================================

More details and summary TBA.

STATUS: First draft finished. Currently in Second draft.
Genre: Sci-Fi Thriller
Similar to: TBA


=======================================================================================

A bored, routine Contract Killer is given another assignment. However, the person he needs to kill--is the same one he made a promise with years prior. To never kill again.

STATUS: Finished.
Genre: Thriller
Similar to: Mr. Brooks, American Psycho, Dexter


=======================================================================================

After a night of heavy drinking, a devil-may-care Gambler wakes up in the middle of the desert finding himself in debt, hired by the Mexican Cartel to pay it off...and wanted by Nevada police for murder.

STATUS: Finished.
Genre: Dark Comedy, Crime Fiction
Similar to: Breaking Bad
Wanna read the script? Download here.

DEUX sounds kickass, more than the others which also sound good though.

SURF WAX, because it sounds like the most original

It's settled then! I'll make all three!

That reminds me, that script you linked me, I couldn't download the PDF or even read it online. What gives?

It won't let you download it or something?

http://www.mediafire.com/?av1oddf4eeguidx

Here you go.

Here's a new one for DEUX:

"A rookie with dumb luck and a skilled veteran are forced to Duel using high tech weaponry. In between rematches, the rookie despeately tries to find a way out".

I'm really trying to get a great sounding logline down before shipping it. One crappy description is all it'll take to put years of work down the crapper.

Well that one makes me/keeps me interested.

SURF WAX! for sure.

Looks to me like the most interesting story and best potential for character development.

OL wrote: If the script is still like the version I read a ways back, you should mention the aspect of the main character being a "tester" for weapons in the tagline for Deux. That was always the most interesting part to me.

Much hasn't changed in that regard. I never thought of describing him as a weapons tester, I should integrate that in somehow. Thanks!

Mitsuzuki wrote: SURF WAX! for sure.

Looks to me like the most interesting story and best potential for character development.

Thanks, man. It's next on the "to do" list. That project is probably the oldest one out of the three but it hasn't got past the outline stage.

Here are some more:

"An undergrad signs up to be a weapons tester that plays out like a high-class Duel to wipe his debt. While ascending the ranks, he realizes he's being hunted outside the game--and now wants out!"

"While competing in a high tech Duel to pay off debts, a sardonic undergrad finds out he's being targeted outside of it now wants out."

"A sardonic twenty-something signs up as a weapons tester in a high-class Duel to pay off massive debts. After being hunted outside the game, now he wants out!"

"Two guys clash in a Duel using state of the art weaponry. The problem with this duel--is that they can't seem to kill each other!"

I narrowed it down to two:

1. A sardonic twenty-something signs up to test high-tech weapons in the form of a Duel to wipe his debt. To get his pay and leave, he must defeat his next opponent--who he can't seem to kill!

2. A twenty-something signs up for a high tech Duel. He constantly draws with an equally skilled foe. If one doesn't win both will lose.

Which one conveys the movie idea the best?


EDIT:

A bud came up with one for me:

3. Struggling with an unpaid debt, a twenty something signs up for a high tech duel, however, he must defeat his next opponent, an adversary who he can't seem to kill.

I think I might go with this one. It sounds the best.

Wow that one is good, it grabs my attention the most and makes the most sense while still sounding good and interesting. Kudos to your friend.