Shenmue Dojo

HAI.

Post things which have made your inner monologue go NERRRRRRRGHHHHHH... BELM.



Whether it be a Facebook status update, Tweet or even a post by someone here *ahem*. Let's post it here and mock the challenged!

Here's one I saw by an associate of mine:

Life admin makes me want to lie down in a dark room with a damp flannel over my eyes.

Yeah, kinda how your status updates make me feel you stupid bitch. "Life admin". Fuck off. Paying bills and ting are a necessary evil in life. Grow a pair and deal with it. Twat.

I work at an ice cream shop and every time someone really really fat comes in and orders I think to myself, "don't order the largest size... don't order the largest size." and when they inevitably say they'll have a large I really let them have it... it my mind.

Kind of like this...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yt9G33TLS6I[/youtube]

There's a quite incredible amount of calories and sugar in "Regular*" juice, so it does make a difference, especially since some people drink literally litres a day?

Girls who says they hate sluts, when they're sluts themselves.

Yokosuka Martian wrote: Girls who says they hate sluts, when they're sluts themselves.

To be fair, nearly everything that women say when they're having "girl talk" makes me belm hard...

Bluecast wrote: Fat people who order a diet soda. Diet soda isn't going to help just quit the shit

I learned in health class that diet soda has a chemical in it called Aspertame. Most diet products do, and Aspertame has been found to increase the bad kind of cholesterol. The teacher even said she would rather have her kids drink regular soda than diet. I avoid Aspertame as much as I can.

It is also suspected to cause cancer. So not only do you drink less calories, you'll lose LOADS of weight when you have to go for chemotherapy.

I thought the title said Belfast like the Belfast festival or something.